Thursday, November 29th. As I'm home sick today we are going to have to push our plans back one day. Many of you and your parents have inquired about the SAT writing section. I'm posting a plan to "beat the essay" and improve your score, courtesy of Ms. Quinn. Please use today's short class to read through the document below.
Tomorrow we will move forward as I intended:
- Friday- review Hamlet essay's (strength, weaknesses, verbs of analysis, opening paragraphs, citations, etc.)
- Monday we will begin A Streetcar Named Desire
How to Beat the SAT Writing Portion-The Persuasive Essay
What the Writing Section Actually Tests
Writing skills and grammar? While
that may sound pretty broad and frightening, the truth about what the Writing
section tests is not so extreme. First, remember that the essay section is only
25 minutes long. Nobody expects you to write a perfect and inspired piece of
work in less than half an hour. In fact, the essay-graders mostly want to see
that you can understand a topic and take a position. And that’s pretty much it.
This chapter tells you the ingredients you’ll need for every SAT essay and
provides a Universal SAT Essay Template that gives you a model essay pattern to
follow.
The multiple-choice questions all
test grammar. The multiple-choice section does not test stuff like
spelling or vocabulary. However, using proper spelling and appropriate
vocabulary is very important on the SAT essay, since the SAT essay-graders
consider your overall command of language when scoring your work.
The
multiple-choice questions, combined with the essay, make up the entire SAT
Writing section.
Beat the Essay
A “great
SAT essay” and a “great essay” are not the same
thing. Truly great essays take hours or even days to plan, research, and write.
The SAT essay can’t take more than 25 minutes. That means you’ve got to write
an essay that convinces your grader of your genius in less time than it takes
to watch The Simpsons, right? Wrong.
The SAT knows that 25 minutes
isn’t enough time for anyone, anywhere, to write a genius essay. Forget genius.
Forget about trying to write an essay that changes the world. When the SAT says
to you, “Here’s 25 minutes, write an essay,” what they’re saying between the
lines is: “Write a standard essay that does exactly what we want.”
To give the
SAT what it wants, you need to have a very firm essay-writing strategy in place
before you sit down to take the test. You then need to apply that strategy to
whatever question the SAT essay poses. In this chapter, we teach you a strategy
for writing a great SAT essay that works every time, on any topic. It all
starts with fast food.
The SAT Essay Directions
The first
thing you should not do when writing your SAT essay is read the
directions. Don’t waste your time on the real test. Instead, read the
directions now and make sure you understand them.
The essay gives you an opportunity to show
how effectively you can develop and express ideas. You should, therefore,
take care to develop your point of view, present your ideas logically and
clearly, and use language precisely.
Your essay must be written on the lines
provided on your answer sheet—you will receive no other paper on which to write.
You will have enough space if you write on every line, avoid wide margins,
and keep your handwriting to a reasonable size. Remember that people who are
not familiar with your handwriting will read what you write. Try to write or
print so that what you are writing is legible to those readers.
You have twenty-five minutes to write an
essay on the topic assigned below. DO NOT WRITE ON ANOTHER TOPIC. AN
OFF-TOPIC ESSAY WILL RECEIVE A SCORE OF ZERO.
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We’ve
translated these directions into a list of Dos and Don’ts to make all the rules
easier to grasp:
DO
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DON’T
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Write only on the given topic as directed.
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Write on a topic that relates vaguely to
the one given.
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Take a clear position on the topic.
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Take a wishy-washy position or try to
argue two sides.
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Write persuasively to convince the grader.
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Write creatively or ornately just to show
off.
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Include reasons and examples that support
your position.
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Include examples not directly related to
your position.
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Write with correct grammar and spelling.
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Forget to proof your work for spelling and
grammar mistakes.
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Write as clearly as possible.
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Use too many fancy vocabulary words or
overly long sentences.
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Write specifically and concretely.
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Be vague or use generalizations.
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Write more than one paragraph.
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Put more importance on length than on
quality.
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Write only on the given lined paper.
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Make your handwriting too large or you’ll
sacrifice space.
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Write as neatly as possible in print or
cursive.
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Write in cursive if you can print. Print
is much easier to read.
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The Grader’s Instructions
The
graders must refer to a set-in-stone list of criteria when evaluating each
essay and deciding what grade (1 through 6) it deserves. The following chart is
our explanation of the grading criteria that the SAT gives the graders.
Score
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Description of Essay
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6
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A 6 essay is superior and
demonstrates a strong and consistent command of the language
throughout the entire essay, with at most a few small errors. A 6 essay:
• shows a firm grasp of critical thinking and takes a powerful and interesting position on the topic • supports and develops its position with appropriate and insightful examples, arguments, and evidence • is tightly organized and focused, with a smooth and coherent progression of ideas • demonstrates a facility with language through the use of descriptive and appropriate vocabulary • uses intelligent variation in sentence structure • contains, at most, a few errors in grammar, spelling, and punctuation. |
5
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A 5 essay is strong and
demonstrates a generally consistent command of language throughout the
entire essay, with no more than a few significant flaws and errors. A 5
essay:
• shows well-developed critical thinking skills by taking a solid position on the topic • supports and develops its position on the topic with appropriate examples, arguments, and evidence • is organized and focused and features a coherent progression of ideas • demonstrates competence with language throughout by using appropriate vocabulary • uses varied sentence structure • contains few errors in grammar, spelling, and punctuation. |
4
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A 4 essay is competent and
demonstrates a basic command of the language throughout the entire
essay. A 4 essay:
• shows adequate critical thinking skill by taking a position on the topic and supporting that position with generally appropriate examples, arguments, and evidence • is mostly organized and focused, with a progression of ideas that is mostly coherent • demonstrates inconsistent facility with language and uses mostly appropriate vocabulary • uses some variation in sentence structure • contains some errors in grammar, spelling, and punctuation. |
3
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A 3 essay shows developing competence
and contains one or more of the following:
• some critical thinking skills, as demonstrated by its position on the topic • inadequate support or development of its position based on deficiencies in examples, arguments, or evidence presented • lapses in organization and focus, including ideas that are not always coherent • a capacity for competent use of language, with occasional use of vague or inappropriate vocabulary • only minor variation in sentence structure • a variety of errors in grammar, spelling, and punctuation. |
2
|
A 2 essay is seriously flawed and
demonstrates a poor command of the language throughout the entire
essay. A 2 essay contains one or more of the following:
• poor critical thinking skills as shown by an inconsistent or unclear position on the topic • insufficient support for the position on the topic as a result of faulty or nonexistent examples, arguments, and evidence • weak organization and focus, including ideas that are frequently incoherent • poor language skills through use of limited or wrong vocabulary • errors in sentence structure • errors in grammar, spelling, punctuation, and other rules of writing that make the meaning hard to understand |
1
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A 1 essay is profoundly flawed and
demonstrates a very poor command of the language throughout the entire
essay. A 1 essay contains one or more of the following:
• no position on the topic, or almost no support or development of the position • poor organization and focus that makes the essay incoherent • numerous vocabulary errors • fundamental errors in sentence structure • errors in grammar, spelling, and punctuation that make parts of the essay unintelligible. |
0
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Essays written on a topic other than the
one assigned will receive a score of zero.
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Know Your Ingredients
To write a tasty SAT essay, you’ve
got to know the necessary ingredients: The different grades of 1 to 6 are based
on the quality of your essay in four fundamental categories.
- Positioning: The strength and clarity of your stance on the given topic.
- Examples: The relevance and development of the examples you use to support your argument.
- Organization: The organization of each of your paragraphs and of your essay overall.
- Command of Language: Sentence construction, grammar, and word choice.
1. Positioning
SAT essay topics are always broad.
Really, really, really broad. We’re talking “the big questions of life” broad.
A typical SAT essay topic gives you a statement that addresses ideas like the
concept of justice, the definition of success, the importance of
learning from mistakes.
The broad nature of SAT topics means you’ll never be forced to
write about topical or controversial issues of politics, culture, or society
(unless you want to; we’ll talk about whether you should want to a
little later). But the broadness of the topics also means that with a little
thought you can come up with plenty of examples to support your position on the
topic.
Philosophers take years to write tomes on the topics of justice
or success. On the SAT, you get 25 minutes. Given these time
constraints, the key to writing a great SAT essay is taking a strong position
on an extremely broad topic. You need to select your position strategically. To
do this, follow a two-step strategy:
- Rephrase the prompt.
- Choose your position.
It’s time
to learn how to take a stand. Here’s a sample essay topic for the SAT:
Think carefully about the issue presented in
the following excerpt and the assignment below.
“It is a mistake to suppose that men succeed through success; they much
oftener succeed through failures. Precept, study, advice, and example could
never have taught them so well as failure has done.”
—Samuel Smiles, Scottish author (1812-1904)
Assignment:
Is there truly no success like failure? Plan
and write an essay in which you develop your point of view on this issue.
Support your position with reasoning and examples taken from your reading,
studies, experience, or observations.
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Rephrase the Prompt
Rephrase the prompt in your own
words and make it more specific. If you rephrase the statement “Is there truly
no success like failure?” you might come up with a sentence like “Can failure
can lead to success by teaching important lessons that help us avoid repeating
mistakes in the future?”
In addition to narrowing down the
focus of the broad original topic, putting the SAT essay question in your own
words makes it easier for you to take a position confidently, since you’ll be
proving your own statement rather than the more obscure version put forth by
the SAT.
Choose Your Position
Agree or disagree. When you choose
an argument for a paper in school, you often have to strain yourself to look
for something original, something subtle. Not here. Not on the 25-minute fast
food essay. Once you’ve rephrased the topic, agree with it or disagree. It’s
that simple.
You may have qualms or otherwise “sophisticated” thoughts at
this point. You may be thinking, “I could argue the ‘agree’ side pretty well,
but I’m not sure that I 100 percent believe in the agree side because. . . .”
Drop those thoughts. Remember, you’re not going to have a week to write this
essay. You need to keep it simple. Agree or disagree, then come up with the
examples that support your simple stand.
2. Examples
To make an SAT essay really shine,
you’ve got to load it up with excellent examples. Just coming up with any three
examples that fit a basic position on a broad topic is not gonna cut it. But
there are two things that do make excellent SAT examples stand out from
the crowd:
- Specific examples
- Variety of examples
Specific Examples
Good examples discuss specific
events, dates, or measurable changes over time. Another way to put this is, you
have to be able to talk about things that have happened in detail.
Let’s say you’re trying to think of examples to support the position
that “learning the lessons taught by failure is a sure route to success.”
Perhaps you come up with the example of the American army during the
Revolutionary War, which learned from its failures in the early years of the
war how it needed to fight the British. Awesome! That’s a potentially
great example. To make it actually great, though, you have to be able to
say more than just, “The American army learned from its mistakes and then
defeated the British Redcoats.” You need to be specific: Give dates, mention
people, battles, tactics. If you use the experience of the American Army in the
Revolutionary War as an example, you might mention the signing of the Treaty of
Paris in 1783, which officially granted the Americans independence and gave the
United States all lands east of the Mississippi River.
Just as bricks hold up a building,
such detailed facts support an argument. There are literally millions of good,
potential examples for every position you might choose. You need to choose
examples that you know a lot about in order to be specific. Knowing a lot about
an example means you know more than just the basic facts. You need to be able
to use all the detailed facts about your example, such as dates and events, to
show how your example proves your argument.
Knowing that the Americans
defeated the British in 1783 is the start of a great example, but you must show
specifically how the American victory proves the argument that “there’s no
success like failure.” What failures on the part of the British government and
army led to the Americans’ success? (Morale issues, leadership differences,
inadequate soldiers and supplies, the Battle of Yorktown, and so on.) The
one-two punch of a solid example and details that use the example to prove your
argument make the difference between a good SAT essay example and a great one.
Variety of Examples
The other crucial thing about SAT
essay examples is how much ground they cover. Sure, you could come up with
three examples from your personal life about how you learned from failure. But
you’re much more likely to impress the grader and write a better essay if you
use a broad range of examples from different areas: history, art, politics,
literature, science, and so on. That means when you’re thinking up examples,
you should consider as wide a variety as possible, as long as all of your
examples remain closely tied to proving your argument.
To prove the position that “there’s no success like failure,”
you might choose one example from history, literature, and business or current
events. Here are three examples that you might choose from those three areas:
- History: The Americans’ victory over the British in the Revolutionary War.
- Literature: Dickens’s success in writing about the working class based on his years spent in poverty as a child laborer.
- Business or Current Events: The JetBlue airline succeeding by learning from the mistakes of its competitors.
A broad array of examples like
those will provide a more solid and defensible position than three examples
drawn from personal experience or from just one or two areas.
A Note on
Truthfulness in Examples
The SAT essay tests how well
you write. The examples you choose to support your argument and your
development of those examples is a big part of how well you write. But there’s
no SAT rule or law that says that the examples you use to support your
arguments have to be true.
That does not mean you
should make up examples from history or bend facts into falsehoods. Instead, it
means you can take examples drawn from your personal experience or your own
knowledge and present them as examples from current events, art, literature,
business, or almost any other topic. For instance, let’s say your Aunt Edna
started a business selling chocolate-covered pretzels on the street in New York
City. She started the business because she noticed that her friends and
neighbors were sick and tired of the dull, flavorless New York City pretzels
offered at other stands, many of which had gone out of business due to lack of
demand. Her chocolate-covered pretzel business became a success based on her
competitors’ failures. Turn that example into an article you recently read in
your local newspaper, and you’ve transformed your personal knowledge into a
much more credible and impressive example about success and failure in
business. It’s certainly better to use universal examples based on facts and
events that your grader might recognize. If you’re in a bind, however, remember
that you can bend the truth a bit and use your personal knowledge and experience
to generate examples that prove your argument.
3. Organization
No matter what topic you end up
writing about, the organization of your essay should be the same. That’s right,
the same. If you’re asked to write about whether “there’s no success like
failure” or about the merits of the phrase “progress always comes at a cost,”
the structure of your essay should be almost identical. The SAT is
looking for those standard ingredients, and the structure we’re about to
explain will make sure those ingredients stand out in your essay.
So what’s
this magical essay structure? Well, it’s back to the trusty
Know How to Put the Ingredients Together
By now you know all of the
ingredients you should use and the template you should follow to write a great
SAT essay. Next you need to learn the writing process that will empower you to put
it all together into a top-score-worthy essay every time. Follow the five steps
we describe next and you’ll be on your way to a 6.
Five Steps to a 6
Step 1
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Understand the topic and take a position.
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1 minute
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Step 2
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Brainstorm examples.
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2–3 minutes
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Step 3
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Create an outline.
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3–4 minutes
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Step 4
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Write the essay.
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15 minutes
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Step 5
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Proof the essay.
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2 minutes
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Step 1: Understand the topic and take a position. (1 minute)
The first
thing you must do before you can even think about your essay is read the topic
very carefully. Here’s the sample topic we use throughout this section:
Consider the following statement and
assignment. Then write an essay as directed.
“There’s no success like failure.”
Assignment:
Write an essay in which you agree or
disagree with the statement above. Remember to back up your position with
specific examples from personal experience, current events, history,
literature, or any other discipline. Your essay should be specific.
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Make sure you understand the topic thoroughly by making it your
own. To do that, use the two strategies we discussed in the Ingredients
section:
- Rephrase the Prompt. “Failure can lead to success by teaching important lessons that help us avoid repeating mistakes in the future.”
- Choose Your Position. (In our example, we agree with the topic.)
That’s it. One step down, four more to go.
Step 2: Brainstorm examples. (2–3 minutes)
Your position is that you agree
with the statement that “failure can lead to success by teaching important
lessons that help us avoid repeating mistakes in the future.” Terrific.
Brainstorming, or thinking up examples to support your position,
is the crucial next step. Plenty of SAT-takers will succumb to the temptation
to plunge straight from Step 1 into writing the essay (Step 4). Skipping the
brainstorming session will leave you with an opinion on the topic but with no
clearly thought-out examples to prove your point. You’ll write the first thing
that comes to mind, and your essay will probably derail. So even though you
feel the time pressure, don’t skip brainstorming.
Brainstorming seems simple. You
just close your eyes and scrunch up your face and THINK REALLY HARD until you
come up with some examples. But, in practice, brainstorming while staring at a
blank page under time pressure can be intimidating and frustrating. To make
brainstorming less daunting and more productive, we’ve got two strategies to
suggest:
Brainstorm by
Category
The best
examples you can generate to support your SAT essay topic will come from a
variety of sources such as science, history, politics, art, literature,
business, and personal experience. So, brainstorm a list split up by category.
Here’s the list we brainstormed for the topic, “There’s no success like
failure.”
Current Events
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Failure of 9/11 security led to the
creation of Homeland Security.
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Science
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Babies learn to walk only after trying and
failing time and again.
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History
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Can’t think of one.
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Politics
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The US Constitution was written
only after the failure of the Articles of Confederation.
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Art
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Can’t think of one.
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Literature
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James Joyce became a writer only after
failing as a singer.
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Personal Experience
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Rod Johnson (your uncle) realized the need
for a placement agency in South Carolina after getting laid off.
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Business
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Google watched the failures of its
competitors and learned to improve its Internet business model and
technology.
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Let’s say you took three minutes and came up with a list of
eight categories like ours, and you got examples for five of them. That’s still
great. That means your next step is to choose the top three of your five
potential examples.
Prepare Ahead of
Time
If you want to put in the time,
you could also do some brainstorming ahead of time. Brainstorming ahead of time
can be a great method, because it gives you time to do more than just
brainstorm. You can actually prepare examples for each of the seven categories
we’ve brainstormed above in our chart. You could, for instance, read up about
various scientists, learning about their successes, their failures, the impact
of their discoveries (positive and negative), and memorize dates, events, and
other facts.
The risk inherent in planning ahead is that you can get stuck
with a topic on the SAT in which all your knowledge about scientists just isn’t
applicable. But while this is somewhat of a risk, since the SAT essay topics
are so broad, you can often massage your examples to fit. Preparing ahead of
time will pay off if you develop a few examples that you know a lot about for
the essay. But it could backfire if it winds up that you absolutely cannot use
the examples you prepared. Then you’ll have to resort to thinking up examples
on the spot. If you don’t want to risk wasting time preparing ahead of time,
don’t. It’s up to you.
Choose Your Top
Three
When you go through your
brainstormed and pre-prepared examples to decide which three you should
actually use, you need to keep three things in mind:
- Which examples can you be most specific about?
- Which examples will give your essay the broadest range?
- Which examples are not controversial?
The first two reasons are pretty
straightforward: Specificity and variety in your examples will help you write
the strongest essay. The point about controversy is a bit more subtle. Staying
away from very controversial examples ensures that you won’t accidentally
offend or annoy your grader, who might then be more inclined to lower your
grade. For instance, the 9/11 example from our brainstormed list should be cut.
The event just is too full of unresolved issues to serve as a suitable essay
topic, and the last thing you want to do is upset or offend your grader.
Here’s another example. Let’s say
that you’re not so certain if that story about James Joyce being a singer is
even really true, and that you think lots of people might go for the babies
walking example. That would mean you decide to keep the examples about the Constitution,
Google, and the story of Rod Johnson. What if instead of referring to Rod
Johnson as your enterprising uncle, you portray him as a businessman you read
about in an esteemed publication recently? Transform your personal experience
and make it seem like an actual example from current events. The SAT essay
graders care much more about how well you write and how intelligently you can
use examples to back up your position than they care about the truth of what
you say in examples drawn from personal experience.
That means you’ve narrowed down your brainstormed topics to the
top three. Next up: Outlining.
Step 3: Create an outline. (3–4 minutes)
After brainstorming comes the
essay writing step that students tend to dread most—writing an outline. So
we’re here to encourage you to embrace the outline. Love the outline! Live the
outline! At the very least, write the outline. On fast food essays like the
SAT essay, which rewards standard conformity much more than it does creativity,
organizing your ideas in outline form and then sticking to that outline is
crucial. Though you may feel that you’re wasting your time, we guarantee that
the four or five minutes that you invest in writing an outline will definitely
be paid back when you write the essay.
Writing the
Outline
Since your
outline is a kind of bare-bones “map” of your essay, the outline should follow
our Universal SAT Essay Template. Here’s a summary of the template:
PARAGRAPH
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PURPOSE
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WHAT IT SHOULD CONTAIN
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1
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Introduction
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Thesis statement; state examples
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2
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Example 1
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Topic sentence for example 1; explain
example 1
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3
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Example 2
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Topic sentence for example 2; explain
example 2
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4
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Example 3
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Topic sentence for example 3; explain
example 3
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5
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Conclusion
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Thesis rephrased in a broader way; a look
into the future
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As you write the outline, remember
that conveying your ideas clearly matters at this stage. Your outline need not
be articulate or even comprehensible to anyone other than you. Your outline
must contain all the essential raw material that will become your thesis
statement, topic sentences, and concluding statement when you write your essay.
As you
sketch out your outline, consider where you want each example to go. We suggest
that you put what you consider to be your strongest example first, followed by
the second strongest, and then the least strong. We suggest this because the
essay is a timed section, and if for some reason you run out of time and can
only fit two example paragraphs between your intro and conclusion, they might
as well be your best two examples. Here’s a sample outline we’ve written based
on the topic and examples we have already discussed. Notice that we’ve placed
our examples in strongest to weakest order starting in paragraph 2.
PARAGRAPH 1: INTRODUCTION
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Failure can lead to success teaching
lessons, learning mistakes. Three examples: (1) US Constitution and Articles
failure, (2) failed dot-coms lead to more successful online businesses, (3)
guy who started successful recruiting business after getting laid off.
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PARAGRAPH 2: EXAMPLE 1 (BEST)
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US Constitution developed by studying the
failures of previous document, Articles of Confederation. By studying
failures US became true revolutionary democracy.
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PARAGRAPH 3: EXAMPLE 2 (NEXT BEST)
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Google studied competitors’ struggles,
came up with better technological solution and better business model. Since
failure is good teacher, intelligent companies look for failure everywhere,
even in rivals, to learn and evolve.
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PARAGRAPH 4: EXAMPLE 3 (NEXT BEST)
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Johnson founded job placement agency based
on difficulties finding a new job after getting laid off. Studied his
failure, found problems lay with system, not with him.
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PARAGRAPH 5: CONCLUSION
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Failure often seen as embarrassing. People
try to hide it. But if you or society take responsibility for it, study it,
history shows failure leads to success for everyone.
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Your outline does not have to be
written in complete sentences. Notice how in the example above we drop verbs
and write in a note-taking style. Feel free to write just enough to convey to
yourself what you need to be able to follow during the actual writing of your
essay. Once you have the outline down on paper, writing the essay becomes more
a job of polishing language and ideas than creating them from scratch.
Step 4: Write the essay. (15 minutes)
Writing the essay consists of
filling out your ideas by following your outline and plugging in what’s
missing. That adds up to only about ten more sentences than what you’ve jotted
down in your outline, which should already contain a basic version of your
thesis statement, one topic sentence for each of your three examples, and a
conclusion statement that ties everything together. All together your essay
should be about fifteen to twenty sentences long.
As you write, keep these three facets of your essay in mind:
- Organization
- Development
- Clarity
Following your outline will make
sure you stick to the Universal SAT Essay Template. That means organization
shouldn’t be a problem.
As far as development goes, you should make sure that
every sentence in the essay serves the greater goal of proving your thesis
statement as well as the more immediate purpose of building on the supporting
examples you present in the intro and in each example paragraph’s topic
sentence. You should also make sure that you are specific with your
examples: give dates, describe events in detail, and so on.
By clarity, we mean the simplicity of the language that
you use. That involves spelling and grammar, but it also means focusing on
varying sentence length and structure as well as including a few well-placed
vocabulary words that you definitely know how to use correctly.
Do not break from your outline. Never pause for a digression or
drop in a fact or detail that’s not entirely relevant to your essay’s thesis
statement. You’re serving fast food, and fast food always sticks to the core
ingredients and the universal recipe.
If You Run Out of
Time
If you’re running out of time
before finishing the intro, all three example paragraphs, and the conclusion,
there’s still hope. Here’s what you should do: Drop one of your example
paragraphs. You can still get a decent score, possibly a 4 or 5, with just two.
Three examples is definitely the strongest and safest way to go, but if you
just can’t get through three, take your two best examples and go with them.
Just be sure to include an introduction and a conclusion in every SAT essay.
The Finished
Essay: Our Example
Here is an
example of a complete SAT essay. It’s based strictly on the outline we built in
step 3 of our Five Steps to a 6, with a focus on clear simple language and the
occasional drop of special sauce.
Learning the
lessons taught by failure is a sure route to success. The United States of
America can be seen as a success that emerged from failure: by learning from
the weaknesses of the Articles of Confederation, the founding fathers
were able to create the Constitution, the document on which America is
built. Google Inc., the popular Internet search engine, is another example of
a success that arose from learning from failure, though in this case Google
learned from the failures of its competitors. Another example that shows how
success can arise from failure is the story of Rod Johnson, who started a
recruiting firm that arose from Johnson’s personal experience of being laid
off.
The United States, the first great democracy of the modern world, is
also one of the best examples of a success achieved by studying and learning
from earlier failures. After just five years of living under the Articles
of Confederation, which established the United States of America as a
single country for the first time, the states realized that they needed a new
document and a new, more powerful government. In 1786, the Annapolis
convention was convened. The result, three years later, was the Constitution,
which created a more powerful central government while also maintaining the
integrity of the states. By learning from the failure of the Articles,
the founding fathers created the founding document of a country that has
become both the most powerful country in the world and a beacon of democracy.
Unlike the United States, which had its fair share of ups and downs
over the years, the Internet search engine company, Google, has suffered few
setbacks since it went into business in the late 1990s. Google has succeeded
by studying the failures of other companies in order to help it innovate its
technology and business model. Google identified and solved the problem of
assessing the quality of search results by using the number of links pointing
to a page as an indicator of the number of people who find the page valuable.
Suddenly, Google’s search results became far more accurate and reliable than
those from other companies, and now Google’s dominance in the field of
Internet search is almost absolute.
The example of Rod Johnson’s success also shows how effective learning
from mistakes and failure can be. Rather than accept his failure after being
laid off, Johnson decided to study it. After a month of research, Johnson
realized that his failure to find a new job resulted primarily from the
inefficiency of the local job placement agencies, not from his own
deficiencies. A month later, Johnson created Johnson Staffing to correct this
weakness in the job placement sector. Today Johnson Staffing is the largest
job placement agency in South Carolina and is in the process of expanding
into a national corporation.
Failure is often seen as embarrassing, something to be denied and
hidden. But as the examples of the U.S. Constitution, Google, and Rod
Johnson prove, if an individual, organization, or even a nation is strong
enough to face and study its failure, then that failure can become a powerful
teacher. The examples of history and business demonstrate that failure can be
the best catalyst of success, but only if people have the courage to face it
head on.
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Step 5: Proof the essay. (2 minutes)
Proofing your essay means reading
through your finished essay to correct mistakes or to clear up words that are
difficult to read. If you don’t have two minutes after you’ve finished writing
the essay (step 4), spend whatever time you do have left proofing. Read over
your essay and search for rough writing, bad transitions, grammatical errors,
repetitive sentence structure, and all that special sauce stuff. The SAT
explicitly says that handwriting will not affect your grade, but you should
also be on the lookout for instances in which bad handwriting makes it look as
if you’ve made a grammatical or spelling mistake.
If you’re
running out of time and you have to skip a step, proofing is the step to drop.
Proofing is important, but it’s the only one of the Five Steps to a 6 that
isn’t absolutely crucial.
Two Sample SAT Essays—Up Close
Below is our sample essay
question, which is designed to be as close as possible to an essay question
that might appear on the SAT. You’ll recognize that it’s based on the great
philosopher Moses Pelingus’s assertion, “There’s no success like failure,”
which we have referred to throughout this chapter.
This particular essay topic presents you with a very broad idea
and then asks you to explain your view and back it up with concrete examples.
Not every SAT essay topic will take this form, but every SAT essay question
will require you to take a position and defend it with examples.
Here’s the
sample prompt again:
Consider carefully the following quotation
and the assignment below it. Then plan and write an essay that explains your
ideas as persuasively as possible. Keep in mind that the support you
provide—both reasons and examples—will help make your view convincing to the
reader.
“There’s no success like failure.”
What is your view on the idea that success
can begin with failure? In an essay, support your position using an example
(or examples) from literature, the arts, history, current events, politics,
science and technology, or from your personal experience or observation.
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Below are two different versions of responses to our sample
essay question. We provide examples of a 6 essay and a 4 essay, complete with a
brief analysis of each essay and how they differ from each other. We evaluate
both essays according to three sets of criteria:
- Our four essential essay ingredients
- The SAT grader’s checklist
- A checklist based on our Universal SAT Essay Template
As you read both examples, note that we have marked certain
sentences and paragraphs to illustrate where and how the essay does or does not
abide by our Universal SAT Essay Template.
A 6 Essay
Learning the
lessons taught by failure is a sure route to success. (THESIS STATEMENT) The
United States of America can be seen as a success that emerged from failure:
by learning from the weaknesses of the Articles of Confederation, the
founding fathers were able to create the Constitution, the document on
which America is built. (BEST SUPPORTING EXAMPLE [1]) Google Inc., the
popular Internet search engine, is another example of a success that arose
from learning from failure, though in this case Google learned from the
failures of its competitors. (NEXT BEST SUPPORTING EXAMPLE [2]) Another
example that shows how success can arise from failure is the story of Rod
Johnson, who started a recruiting firm that arose from Johnson’s personal
experience of being laid off. (NEXT BEST SUPPORTING EXAMPLE [3])
The United States, the first great democracy of the modern world, is
also one of the best examples of a success achieved by studying and learning
from earlier failures. (TOPIC SENTENCE FOR EXAMPLE 1) After just five years
of living under the Articles of Confederation, which established the
United States of America as a single country for the first time, the states
realized that they needed a new document and a new more powerful government.
In 1786, the Annapolis convention was convened. The result, three years
later, was the Constitution, which created a more powerful central
government while also maintaining the integrity of the states. By learning
from the failure of the Articles, the founding fathers created the
founding document of a country that has become both the most powerful country
in the world and a beacon of democracy. (FOUR DEVELOPMENT SENTENCES TO
SUPPORT EXAMPLE 1)
Unlike the United States, which had its fair share of ups and downs
over the years, the Internet search engine company, Google Inc., has suffered
few setbacks since it went into business in the late 1990s. (TOPIC SENTENCE
FOR EXAMPLE 2) Google has succeeded by studying the failures of other
companies in order to help it innovate its technology and business model.
Google identified and solved the problem of assessing the quality of search
results by using the number of links pointing to a page as an indicator of
the number of people who find the page valuable. Suddenly, Google’s search
results became far more accurate and reliable than those from other
companies, and now Google’s dominance in the field of Internet search is
almost absolute. (THREE DEVELOPMENT SENTENCES TO SUPPORT EXAMPLE 2)
The example of Rod Johnson’s success as an entrepreneur in the
recruiting field also shows how effective learning from mistakes and failure
can be. (TOPIC SENTENCE FOR EXAMPLE 3) Rather than accept his failure after
being laid off, Johnson decided to study it. After a month of research, Johnson
realized that his failure to find a new job resulted primarily from the
inefficiency of the local job placement agencies, not from his own
deficiencies. A month later, Johnson created Johnson Staffing to correct this
weakness in the job placement sector. Today Johnson Staffing is the largest
job placement agency in South Carolina, and is in the process of expanding
into a national corporation. (FOUR DEVELOPMENT SENTENCES TO SUPPORT EXAMPLE
3)
Failure is often seen as embarrassing, something to be denied and
hidden. But as the examples of the U.S. Constitution , Google, and Rod
Johnson prove, if an individual, organization, or even a nation is strong
enough to face and study its failure, then that failure can become a powerful
teacher. (THESIS STATEMENT REPHRASED IN BROADER WAY THAT PUSHES IT FURTHER)
The examples of history and business demonstrate that failure can be the best
catalyst of success, but only if people have the courage to face it head on.
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Why This Essay Deserves a 6
First, we need to assess whether this essay contains the four
essential ingredients of a great SAT essay. Here they are, just to refresh your
memory:
- Positioning: The strength and clarity of the position on the given topic.
- Examples: The relevance and development of the examples used to support your argument.
- Organization: The organization of each paragraph and of the essay overall.
- Command of Language: Sentence construction, grammar, and word choice.
This essay serves up all four SAT essay ingredients. It takes a
very strong and clear stance on the topic in the first sentence and sticks to
it from start to finish. It uses three examples from a very diverse array of
disciplines—from Internet technology to history and politics to a profile of an
entrepreneur—and it never veers from using these examples to support the thesis
statement’s position.
The organization of the essay
follows our Universal SAT Essay Template perfectly, both at the paragraph level
(topic sentences and development sentences) and at the overall essay level
(intro, three meaty example paragraphs, a strong conclusion). The command of
language remains solid throughout. The writer does not take risks with
unfamiliar vocabulary but instead chooses a few out of the ordinary words like beacon,
deficiencies, and innovate that sprinkle just the right amount of
special sauce throughout the essay. Sentence structure varies often, making the
entire essay more interesting and engaging to the grader. Finally, no
significant grammar errors disrupt the overall excellence of this SAT essay.
Here’s a
quick-reference chart that takes a closer look at this 6 essay based on the
actual SAT’s evaluation criteria for graders and based on our Universal SAT
Essay Template.
SAT CRITERIA FOR 6 ESSAYS
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YES OR NO?
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Consistently excellent, with at most a few
minor errors.
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YES
|
Takes a clear position on the topic and
uses insightful relevant examples to back it up.
|
YES
|
Shows strong overall organization and
paragraph development.
|
YES
|
Demonstrates a superior command of
language, as shown by varied sentence structure and word choice.
|
YES
|
OUR UNIVERSAL SAT ESSAY TEMPLATE CRITERIA
|
YES OR NO?
|
Thesis statement in first sentence of
paragraph 1.
|
YES
|
Three examples listed in paragraph 1 in
order from best to worst.
|
YES
|
Topic sentence for example in paragraph 2.
|
YES
|
3–4 development sentences to support
paragraph 2’s example.
|
YES
|
Topic sentence for example in paragraph 3.
|
YES
|
3–4 development sentences to support
paragraph 3’s example.
|
YES
|
Topic sentence for example in paragraph 4.
|
YES
|
3–4 development sentences to support
paragraph 4’s example.
|
YES
|
Conclusion paragraph contains rephrased
thesis statement.
|
YES
|
About 15 sentences total.
|
YES
|
A 4 Essay
Failure can sometimes
lead to success. (THESIS STATEMENT) Many Internet commerce businesses have
learned from the terrible failures of the dot-com boom and bust, and today
are in much stronger more successful positions than they were just a few
years ago. (SUPPORTING EXAMPLE [1]). Another example proving that failure
sometimes leads to success is that of Arnold “Arnie” Wagner, a heavy metal
drummer who learned to play the drums in a better different style after a
crippling car accident almost killed him and his band. (SUPPORTING EXAMPLE
[2])
Not all Internet businesses vanished when the dot-com boom went
bust—some picked up the pieces, learned from their mistakes, and moved on.The
Internet boom was good to online shoppers but not so great to online
businesses. Shoppers reaped the benefits of all kinds of great deals and
online promotions, while e-commerce businesses did themselves in. Some
Internet companies realized the mistakes others were making, such as offering
too deep discounts and not charging for shipping, and they now have benefited
by not suffering the same pitfalls. Only the failure of other business made
this happen. (FOUR DEVELOPMENT SENTENCES TO SUPPORT EXAMPLE 1)
Arnold “Arnie” Wagner is one of the best drummers alive today. (NO
TOPIC SENTENCE TO SUPPORT EXAMPLE 2) He’s sure lucky to be alive! Arnie lost
his right arm in a car crash just as his band Darkness Falls was beginning to
establish success. Rather than give up and fail with his one arm, Wagner took
the problem on courageously and decides to view it as an opportunity to
change his drumming style. He has a special drum kit designed for him,
complete with electronic pedals controlled by foot, which leads him to a new
style and his band to even greater heights of success. (FIVE DEVELOPMENT SENTENCES
TO SUPPORT EXAMPLE 2)
Failure doesn’t have to end there. Often people and businesses use
other’s failures or even their own to learn from mistakes and try not to
repeat them. Proof? Today Arnie Wagner is still on top of the drumming world,
and many online businesses continue to thrive. (THESIS STATEMENT TOUCHED ON,
BUT NOT REPHRASED IN BROADER WAY THAT PUSHES IT FURTHER) The examples of
history and business demonstrate that failure can be the best catalyst of
success, but only if people have the courage to face it head on.
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Why This Essay Deserves a 4
This essay does an adequate job
serving up all four SAT essay ingredients. It’s competent overall but not
exceptional. That’s the key difference between 4 essays and 6 essays. The 4s
are like average students: They do the work the night before, turn it in, and
get back a passing grade that keeps their parents off their back. The 6s are
above excellent students: They do their homework days in advance, turn it in
early, and impress teachers with the superior quality of their work.
More specifically, this 4 essay
takes a stance on the topic in the first sentence and sticks to it, but the
stance is not resoundingly clear from the start: “Failure can sometimes lead to
success.” The thesis statement is vague and makes the essay’s positioning
wishy-washy, which makes it weaker overall than the 6 essay’s unwavering
stance. It does use examples to support its position, but its examples are not
as sophisticated or as varied as the examples in the 6 essay. They’re also not
linked together with transitions and occasionally veer slightly off topic. The
organization of the essay follows our Universal SAT Essay Template closely, but
not perfectly. For starters, it contains only two examples. Though not disastrous,
including only two examples limits the breadth of your support. It also makes
the strength and quality of your examples all the more crucial, since having
only two will make the grader scrutinize them more closely than if your support
were spread over three examples.
At the sentence level, this essay
does include a thesis statement and a topic sentence in the first example
paragraph, but the structure begins to derail at the beginning of the second
example paragraph. The writer introduces the drummer Arnie Wagner, but not in a
way that is directly related to proving the thesis statement. The paragraph
meanders toward a topic sentence, but never regains a sure footing. The
conclusion refers back to the thesis statement in broad terms (“Failure doesn’t
have to end there”), but it does not tie the essay together as well as the
broadening conclusion found in the 6 essay. The command of language remains
acceptable throughout. Compared to the 6 essay, this 4 essay contains
significantly more spelling and grammar errors, most notably the jarring tense
shift in paragraph 3. The entire passage is written in the past tense, but
suddenly shifts into the present tense with the sentence that begins, “He has a
special drum kit. . . .” This essay also features repetitive sentence structure
that makes it a much duller read than the 6. The 4 contains no special sauce
whatsoever, another contributing factor to its average quality overall.
Here’s a
closer look at this 4 essay based on the SAT’s evaluation criteria for graders and
based on our Universal SAT Essay Template. Pay special attention to the
difference in criteria for 4 essays and 6 essays, and to the deficiencies in
the 4 essay as compared to the 6 (the NOs in the YES/NO column). The 4 essay’s
NOs pinpoint its weaknesses, which we just discussed.
SAT CRITERIA FOR 4 ESSAYS
|
YES OR NO?
|
Consistently solid, with at least several
minor errors and a few more serious weaknesses or mistakes.
|
YES
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Addresses the topic presented adequately.
|
YES
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Uses examples to support a position on the
topic.
|
YES
|
Shows acceptable organization and
development throughout.
|
YES
|
Competent but not consistent command of
language, with several errors in grammar and usage and only slight sentence
variation.
|
YES
|
OUR UNIVERSAL SAT ESSAY TEMPLATE CRITERIA
|
YES OR NO?
|
Thesis statement in first sentence of
paragraph 1.
|
YES
|
Three examples listed in paragraph 1 in
order from best to worst.
|
NO
|
Topic sentence for example in paragraph 2.
|
YES
|
3–4 development sentences to support
paragraph 2’s example.
|
YES
|
Topic sentence for example in paragraph 3.
|
NO
|
3–4 development sentences to support
paragraph 3’s example.
|
NO
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Topic sentence for example in paragraph 4.
|
NO
|
3–4 development sentences to support
paragraph 4’s example.
|
NO
|
Conclusion paragraph contains rephrased
thesis statement.
|
YES
|
About 15 sentences total.
|
YES
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